this is me now

May 6, 2008

Always the Responsible One

Filed under: being Seniors,college,roommates,stress — by heatherdc @ 11:28 pm

On a regular Tuesday night, you would find all of us in the apartment going through the TV lineup. Cash Cab, American Idol, The Office, etc. Maybe even stickin’ around for Sex & the City if we are feeling particularly lazy and not removing ourselves from the couch.

Today was like any other Tuesday for me. I didn’t have class on Tuesday, so I was usually the only one home in the morning. I go the gym, lounge around, watch daytime talk shows (Regis & Kelly, Ellen!! I loooove Ellen), get ready and then head off to work for the afternoon. But it was different for everyone else, because while they usually did have class, this is finals week. So everybody was around, lounging with me.

Tonight is different too. Without any classes, or real responsibilities tomorrow, everyone made the obvious decision to go out. We have to live it up for the next week and a half, this is all we’ve got! There’s one little problem though; I have a final at 8 in the morning. That’s early. Thats like, really early. And while I did look over it a little bit at work today, I definitely wasn’t confident enough to go have drinks all night instead of looking over my notes.

The responsible thing to do is to stay in, study, relax, go to bed early, and wake up early. The responsible thing to do is to be prepared for a final, even if it is the LAST one you will ever take. I always do the responsible thing.

I’m never the person that goes out before the test, or stays up until 5 a.m. on Sunday writing a paper because I spent the whole weekend out at the bars or with friends. I’ve never pulled an all-nighter, because I’ve never needed to. I can count on one hand the amount of times that I’ve put school on the back-burner during the important times (tests coming up, projects due, etc.) to realize that this is Just “school”, and I’d rather have fun for tonight. Yes, I’ve done it, and yes it was worth it. Every time. Obviously it would have been a little detrimental if I had always had this attitude. I know that. I know that for most situations I’ll find myself in during this life, this is a good trait to have. But I also feel like I have a hard time finding the balance….

After my roommates left I just wondered…will I regret this? Will I really learn so much in the next two hours before I sleep that it was well worth missing out on one more night with them? Will any grade I get on this test really make me think, “I’m glad I stayed in and studied instead”?

Obviously I don’t think I’m going to fail. And obviously I realize that most people wouldn’t go out the night before an 8-a.m. final. I know, it’s just one night. But I’m looking at this from the “Senior” prospective. I know that tomorrow I’ll feel amazing because I’ll be DONE and I won’t have to worry about this nagging thought anymore. I know that tomorrow night-and every night until next Saturday- I’ll be out with my roommates-and my best friends-with a drink in my hand to celebrate, laugh, relax, and enjoy the company of best friends.

Tomorrow night can’t come fast enough.

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